Lying and honesty with children

4:22:16

2023-07-12

451

Parents must pay attention to the fact that children are like a sponge that absorbs all the water around it, and that they are like fertile soil that can be planted in anything. Therefore, they are obligated not to be wrong with them in all their actions, so it is not permissible for them to lie to them, rather they should be In all their actions, they are honest without the slightest equivocation or deceit.

When you promise your son that you will bring him a gift if he succeeds in school, then when he succeeds, you do not bring him this gift, because you are teaching him the first lesson of lying. If I say: What if I am not able to bring him the gift that I promised? I said: You must first: study your capabilities before you promise him, if you are not able to do that, do not promise him from the beginning, and if you are able, but you become incapacitated, then if you are not able to borrow to fulfill your promise to him, you must put your son in the picture and explain to him that you signed In a deficit and you will fulfill your promise to him after completing this problem and renew the ability to buy the gift you promised him.

Islam warned against this matter because of its negative effects on education. Because the subject of truth and lying are among the most important topics that Islam urged attention to, and warned against us falling into it, and called on us to teach our children that it poses a threat to their future that they must not fall into. The Messenger of God (may God bless him and his family) said:

Lying is not good in seriousness or jest, nor for a man to promise his son and then not fulfill him. Truthfulness leads to righteousness, and righteousness leads to heaven, and lying leads to immorality, and immorality leads to hellfire.

In this hadith, there is an indication that lying should be avoided, even in jest. The honorable hadith has specified the issue of lying to the child precisely because of its importance. And if they do that, they do not blame their children after that if they lied, because they are the ones who gave them the first lesson to lie.

Here it is necessary to point out a very important issue, which is what children usually weave from stories that they make up from their imaginations. For example, a child may come to say that he flew in the sky like Superman, or killed the ogre, or carried the building, and this matter if it passes on the basis that it A child is not held accountable for his words, because it contributes to accustoming him to lying, and this child must be understood that this is not true, but without shocking him. Rather, he must be made to understand the reality of the situation and that he, as a human being, cannot fly, and in order for him to accept the idea, you say to him that I am your great father. I can do that, and it is not a weakness, rather it is an expression of my ability as a human being. Of course, it is necessary to choose the method that suits his age.