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Save energy using calm rejection
5:31:33 2023-04-02 1636

Jeremy is two and a half years old; He seems to have learned to be tenacious, as he has been repeating his demands and not stopping until something happens, whether it's ice cream for breakfast and interrupting his mother while she's on the phone, or getting this shiny toy from the store.

Fortunately, his mother, Ally, has figured out how to deal with his behavior. Firstly; She knew that this was part of the normal development of children her son's age and that this behavior would not last forever. secondly; She was able to skillfully use the calm Rejection Technique until it became ingrained in herself!

She'd seen other mothers fight with their two-year-olds until they fell prey into mounting tension:

No, I will not do that!

No, I will not do that!

I won't, I won't, I won't

No, no you can't get it

Mothers allow themselves to be angry, stressed and upset, believing that their voice must be louder than that of their children in order for them to win.

Ally, however, was taking it differently. She was simply answering her son with (no), so calmly (knowing that her son has strong hearing), but if (Jeremy) continued his insistence; she repeating her refusals with the same softness each time, slackening her shoulders and flexing her whole body (a trick that took her a few hours to perfect), When Jeremy yelled, especially in a public place; She imagined herself ferociously carrying him to the car, but at the same time she would relax and smile to herself. She controls her emotions rather than letting her youngest son (Jeremy), control them. This does not preclude that her desire to yell at him invaded her from time to time, but her perception of him enjoying this victory was destroying this desire.

To Ally's surprise, once she had mastered a calm refusal, her son, Jeremy, stopped nagging her completely.

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