الوضع الليلي
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How to deal with your children
1:24:34 2023-11-05 1850

Dear esteemed educator

Dear parents:

Perhaps you would like to send a warning message to your children, but you do not want your style to be characterized by violence towards them.

Here is a way to help you make them aware of the mistake they made without resorting to beating or intimidation

This method was taught by Imam Musa bin Jaafar Al-Kadhim, peace be upon him, to one of his companions. He asked him about a successful method of discipline, and he said to him:

Do not hit him, leave him, and do not prolong it.

It is a rule based on:

First: Prohibition of hitting

Second: Ordering him to abandon the child  as an alternative punishment to beating

Abandonment is limited to not being prolonged, and determining its duration is up to your discretion, taking into account the type of mistake committed by the child, his age, and his cognitive level. This method arouses the child’s feelings and psychological sensations more than beating, which has more disadvantages and does not have any positive effect. Studies have proven that corporal punishment, such as beating, has a bad effect. And negative for the child in the long term.

Studies have discovered that children who have been subjected to corporal punishment have lower self-esteem and do not feel their value, and they may perform poorly in school and in social life, while your abandonment of him will arouse him and push him to think about what he did and try to hold himself accountable and realize your value in his life, so he tries to please you or get to know you. The reason you don't talk to him or care about him or you don't care about his presence..

After you notice a change in his behavior, return to your embrace, hold him close to you, fill him with tenderness, and make him understand the necessity of adhering to the etiquette and instructions you give him. Because you love him and want him to be happy and content.

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